Yes, that title. Well, I was trying to think of something witty and catchy and memorable and I was failing. I wanted something that reflected the life of a 40ish working mum of two and that also managed to convey the depths of my insecurity. Then I remembered the day my younger son (now aged 7, then aged 4) was watching me get ready. He knew I had been going to the gym and I had told him why I was going, particularly that I was trying to be a slimmer mum. He looked at me, very seriously, and then said "Mum? The gym isn't working." So there you go. The gym isn't working. Welcome.