Miscellaneous number one:
Having just spent an obscene amount of money on filling up our car, I commented to the boys in the back seat on how expensive diesel is these days. Without looking up from his Nintendo DS, Second Born observed that diesel was still cheaper than running the car on bull sperm. No, I didn't ask. Scared to, frankly.
Miscellaneous number two:
Another in the series of "Sentences You Never Thought You'd Say" from Husband (he was in the living room with the boys, I overheard as I was lurking in the kitchen): "No, it's not realistic, it's a stuffed monkey firing a gun."
Miscellaneous number three:
Do you have any idea how mind-bendingly annoying it is when your Husband decides to play "Tijuana Taxi" (again, no idea why) and then adds lyrics as if sung by our cats, which go "Crunchy little mouse, it's a crunchy little mouse, it's a crunchy little mouse, and you eat it......for your break-time sna-ha-hack!" If you don't, would you like me to come round to your house and sing it for you? Then you too can have it in your head FOR THE REST OF ETERNITY. (Clue: no, you almost certainly don't)